I often feel that mindset has a huge impact on your overall success or failure, in anything, and many studies have shown evidence that how you feel about things does , in fact, make a big difference.
Just yesterday, I saw someone I hadn’t seen in a long while and who I don’t particularly like and, not surprisingly, brought up a bad mood in me shortly after our interaction. I know that sounds really vague, but I prefer not to put my personal life acquaintances on blast so there it is, in all its vagueness.
Anyway, this person and I had a short conversation and then he gave me this look for some reason and I just instantly felt judged and what’s more, I felt pissed off about it.
Of course, I immediately assumed this person was judging me by my weight or outfit or whatever. I hadn’t put on much makeup either, so maybe it was that and then, I just stopped and did what any normal woman my age would do – I posted this on Twitter :
“I feel like as
#women, we’re constantly judging ourselves and allowing others to judge us like we deserve it. We don’t. Be kind to yourself.”
Old Nancy was at it again.
I don’t literally mean a person when I say Nancy.
Negative Nancy, as some may call her/him/it, is that little voice in your head that shouts out ugly, negative and often untrue things and will usually get louder and more believable if you let it.
I thank God for all of the amazing bloggers and consequent friends I’ve made since I began blogging last March because I don’t think I would’ve been able to shut that b*tch up if it wasn’t for the support I’ve felt from the online community because I instantly thought, others must be dealing with this too – I have to tweet about it and hopefully encourage others as they’ve encouraged me.
Yeah, I’m lame. I think I might save the world with my words, but hey, I just might! 😉 Words are powerful things.
But this weird little epiphany got me thinking that we all deal with this negative self talk (as the self help authors have deemed it) at one point or another and it’s absolutely important to make sure you don’t let that voice of self doubt take over your life.
I’ve learned that it can be hard to ignore at first, but if you make a conscious effort to stay positive and optimistic and know that you are supported, that voice will stay quiet and small.
What’s more than that is I’ve also found that the best weapons against this are gratitude, acceptance, optimism and sweat.
When I work out, I just feel better. I feel more accepting of myself and life and more positive for the future. In turn, I feel more grateful about everything and it just sort of snowballs.
So, amid my rambling, I guess what I’m trying to say is do whatever it is that makes you happy, content, determined, optimistic for the future, and grateful to be living. It doesn’t have to be fitness , though that’s what I enjoy. It can be crafts, art, travel, spending time with your children and/or friends, or meditation. Just find that thing that makes you feel good about life and don’t let the small doubts and fears about life turn into huge roadblocks on your journey to success, happiness and a fulfilling life.
As people, women especially but also men, we tend to be our biggest obstacle: we’re standing in our own way. So, remember to let yourself have what you deserve and also that, when God or fate of the powers of the universe (whatever you believe) close a door, they might just be opening several windows so don’t be afraid to jump when the moment arrives.
How Do You Deal with Negative Self Talk?
I’d Love to Hear Your Methods In the Comments!